In one way or another, for one reason or another, we all do it.
We hide.
And the way many of us hide is by being busy.
It’s easy to hide behind the guise of busyness. It’s socially acceptable and in many ways it’s expected. Busy is the yardstick by which our culture measures our value and we in turn use to measure our own worth.
But busyness is toxic: It distracts us from what we desire most, which over time can be detrimental to our souls.
Often, we don’t know what we want. Busyness doesn’t allow us the space we need to know our true selves let alone to be our true selves.
I know because I unwittingly hid behind busyness for years. The job, career, and small business; the husband; the houses; the dogs; the remodels and new construction; the entertaining; the travel; the possessions; and on and on.
I thought I was living my life. But in reality, life was living me, keeping me so busy I couldn’t see that the life I was living wasn’t a reflection of my true self.
Every now and then I would feel the pang of longing. Longing for what I wasn’t really sure. So, I buried it under more busyness.
One day, when the longing got so loud, I knew the only way I would discover what I wanted for myself was to stop hiding behind the busyness.
It’s hard to come out of hiding when you’ve spent a lifetime behind the mask, playing the roles others assigned or expected of you. But once I took the mask off, there was no putting it back on. I know. I tried. And removing one mask always revealed another.
Coming out of hiding and showing up as your true self, pursuing your desires, is a lifelong journey. There will always be something you’re hiding from—another mask to remove.
It’s hard being seen. It’s uncomfortable. It’s unfamiliar. And it makes you vulnerable to the opinions, judgments, and possible rejection from others—and, sometimes, even from yourself.
The gift always, though, is getting to live the life you are meant to live, pursuing the things that call to your heart, and doing the work* only you can do in the way only you can do it.
Let me ask you …
What longing are you hiding from?
If you’re not sure, how can you create a little space from the distraction of busyness to discover your heart’s desire?
*I use the word “work” loosely, referring not only to professional endeavors.
Note: Lately I have been reading Rumi’s poetry as part of my daily ritual/devotion. This post inspired by a the following poem.
“how long will you hide
your beautiful
festive smile
teach your laughter
to flower
manifest an eternity
why do you think
the door to the sky
is closed on your face
it allures and invites
your magical touch
to open and arrive
an entire caravan
is waiting in ecstasy
for your coming and leading
come on my friend
use your talisman and
harness all their souls
today is the day to unite
with your longing beloved
wait no more
for an unknown tomorrow
a tambourine is in a corner
begging your playing hands
a flute is sitting dormant
begging your happy lips”